I woke up last night and couldn't move my arms. They just wouldn't move for a few moments. Then I got some water and things started to work again. In class this morning, I started to get that cramping in my leg that other people have experienced throughout their body. It was more surprising and interesting than painful, but I sure as hell wouldn't want any more of that. One guy showed me a bruise he had on his leg from intense cramping.
So this is not just about surviving the anguish of the physical torture. It's also about clearing up and letting go. Almost all week my back has been bothering me. I can feel my spine moving and straightening and that's terrific. But in the middle of class this morning, just aching and tired from the continuous back pain, I heard a little voice in my head say, "Let go of the pain, give yourself permission to let go of the pain". And that voice wasn't just talking about the pain in my back. So I laid there and wept a little (that's very common in the studio) and I felt better in so many ways.
Now I'm just tired, so a rest will do me good.
More later.
1 comment:
One word: Pedialyte. Just do it, take it to class, I drank one per class - later in training for other reasons - but cramping this early, nip it in the bud. Find your flavor, and just do it.
Tears, indeed, happen in that room - for me, anyhow, how could they not? You're smart to open yourself to it, not fight it, and let it out. It makes room for something new to come to you!!!
Keep going,you're doing it!!!
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